By Becky Baines, Community Engagement Specialist

Domestic violence thrives in silence. To be able to support victims and survivors, and to prevent domestic violence in the future, we all need to normalize it by talking openly about it. Having an informed conversation about domestic violence requires understanding what it is—that it’s much more than physical abuse—and why ‘just leaving’ isn’t always so simple.

Domestic violence is often thought about in terms of physical violence, but other controlling behavior and abusive tactics often begin long before any physical violence occurs, if it does at all. As a society we all have a role in changing the narrative about what domestic violence is, to whom it happens, how we can support those experiencing it, and ultimately prevent abuse entirely.

This October, in recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), the Advocacy Center of Tompkins County is partnering with the National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV) and other victims resource agencies across the nation to start a coordinated national conversation about domestic violence and how we can all contribute to flipping the script on this important issue. 

How can you help? Join us! Show your support for victims and survivors by following our social media accounts (@AdvocacyTC) and sharing the content  with your own networks throughout the month of October with the hashtag #Every1KnowsSome1. Participate in our events and opportunities throughout the month of October and stay engaged throughout the year to show your support.

Clothesline Project Displays

We are excited to offer 3 socially-distanced opportunities to see this powerful display. This project provides a space for domestic and sexual violence survivors to create and unapologetically display the “dirty laundry” that is abuse. The t-shirts contain powerful stories, images, and artwork. They are hung on a clothesline to show that the people who experience domestic, sexual, and/or emotional violence are not just statistics, but are everyday people in our communities and neighborhoods. 

• Trumansburg Farmers Market: October 6th, 4pm-6p
• Ithaca Commons Pavilion: October 12th, 10am-1pm
• TC3 Library: October 18th-20th during normal open hours

Shine the Light on Domestic Violence – Go Purple! October 21st – All Day 

Grab your favorite purple scarf, pants, shirt, hat, skirt – anything really- and join others around NYS in going purple to raise awareness and show support for survivors of domestic violence. Please share a picture on social media using hashtag #GoPurpleTompkins and be sure to tag us @AdvocacyTC.

Supporting Someone I’m Concerned About Workshop, Oct 14th and Oct 27th via Zoom

Knowing what to say to someone who may be experiencing relationship violence and/or sexual assault can be overwhelming and downright scary. Though it may be tough, you can still provide support to the person you’re concerned about. For more information, and to register, please contact our Lead Educator at nbarry@actompkins.org.

Raising Awareness on Our Campuses

We are excited to partner with Cornell, Ithaca College, and TC3 to join them in their awareness efforts for students, faculty, and staff. As you engage with the campuses (in person or online) you may notice new posters, lots of purple, Bystander Intervention Trainings, Relationship Spectrum Conversations (i.e. What is the difference between a healthy, unhealthy, and abusive relationship? What does sex, communication, and power look like in different types of relationships? ). To learn more, email our Campus Educator at naiarabg@actompkins.org.

Wear a Purple Ribbon All Month Long!

The purple ribbons of October are intended to draw our attention to the issue of domestic violence. For more than 30 years, the bold, beautiful colors of October have been linked with the deep, rich purple of ribbons that symbolize the observance of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM). Keep an eye on our social media (@AdvocacyTC) for announcements regarding where you can pick up a ribbon to wear throughout the month, or contact our Community Engagement Specialist at bbaines@actompkins.org.

Additional Training Opportunities:

Our Education team offers a number of training opportunities about domestic violence throughout the year. To request a training, email info@actompkins.org. 

A few examples include:

• How Can I Help You? Responding to Abuse & Disclosures
• Domestic Violence in the Workplace
• Getting to Know the Advocacy Center